Me

Milestones for Grown-Ups: Life is a Journey

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I call my mom every day when I commute to work. She is my best friend. She is the woman who wrote down every developmental milestone into my baby book. She will still brag about how I was potty trained and walking at 12 months. No one could ever be more proud of me and my accomplishments.

Milestones are an interesting concept; they represent a notable point in one’s development. Some children and adults follow a typical path, while others stray far from the norm. Regardless, everyone has a different journey.

Milestones for Grown-ups
Milestones for Grown-ups

 

Today’s review features Milestones for Grown-ups, an Australian based company bringing you 20 unique milestone cards for adults entering their 20s and 30s. Anna, the creator of Milestones for Grown-ups, realized that babies and toddlers were having all of the fun celebrating developmental milestones, but older folks never received any recognition for hitting adult milestones. (Graduating college, anyone?) The postcard size, environmentally-friendly cards are intended to be used as photo props to share with family and friends on social media to document adult milestones.

Two sets of Milestones for Grown-ups cards are available for purchase:

  • Milestones for your 20’s:
    • I finally bought myself ________. (you fill in the blank)
    • Graduation Day
    • I am a Quarter of a Century Old
    • I got a job!
    • Yes! I cooked this!
    • I am moving out!
  • Milestones for your 30’s:
    • I found my first grey hair.
    • I paid off my student loan.
    • I ran a marathon.
    • Today I was called madam/sir (circle one) by a teenager.
    • Actually…I am doing quite well.
    • My new tattoo.

Milestones for Grown-ups

Each deck is $29.95 AUS (About $23 for my United States readers at the current exchange rate at the time of writing this post). Australian shipping is free; other shipping runs $5-$8 AUS.

My Thoughts

Life is to be celebrated. I always say, “Every day I wake up is a good day.” Am I right?

I reflected on my 20s earlier this year when I turned 30. I hit so many milestones in my twenties. I do wish I had the “Yes! I cooked this!” card from the 20s pack since I successfully cooked a whole chicken the other day. I ordered one by mistake on my supermarket online order and I called my mom to ask her, “What the hell do I do with this thing? I wanted a rotisserie chicken, not a whole chicken!” My mom giggled and told me to get out my roasting pan (buried in the back of my cabinet) and to make sure I take the giblets out. (Thanks, Mom!) My chicken and potato dish came out fantastic. I was so proud that I accomplished cooking something that I normally wouldn’t attempt. Mistakes can be a good thing. 

Milestones for Grown-ups understands that everyone hits different milestones at different times. For some of us, we never hit them. And, that’s okay. The Milestones for Grown-ups cards can be used at any life stage, and make terrific gifts for those turning 20 or 30.

Milestones for Grown-ups

The “I ran a marathon” card looks daunting, however, I am going to scribble a “1/2” in front of marathon and will proudly hold up that card after my mom and I complete our first half marathon in October. Isn’t it a little ironic that the woman who wrote down all of my developmental milestones will be accomplishing a huge fitness milestone with me? It’s never too late to reach your goals. 

I can’t wait for the day to hold up the “I paid off my student loan” card. I pass by that card really quickly in the deck, as I currently have another 2.5 years left. (I accept any and all donations.)

“Actually…I am doing quite well!” is my favorite card. Wherever you are in life, be proud of yourself. I am proud that I can hold up the “I am starting my own business” card since I became a doTERRA Wellness Advocate this year and Realm of Vibes is doing well with reviewing products for small businesses like Milestones for Grown-ups. I have a wonderful husband and family, a fulfilling career, and love my very blessed life.

Milestones for Grown-ups

Let’s see how many Milestones for Grown-ups I can accomplish the next ten years…

Who is with me?

Namaste.

Make sure you visit Milestones for Grown-ups on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Milestones for Grown-Ups

Disclosure: I received Milestones for your 30’s in return for an honest review and promotion on my social media sites. All opinions within are my own. Realm of Vibes is looking for small businesses to feature; if you are interested please fill out the form on the Contact page or e-mail realmofvibesdg@gmail.com for more details. 

What to Think when You’re Having a Bad Day

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Ever have one of those days where you think to yourself, “I should have just stayed in bed!” I know that I have had days where everything, from the time my feet hit my bedroom’s floor, goes terribly wrong, and I count the minutes until I clock out of work and race to my car in the parking lot. I crank up the radio and just can’t wait to get home, pour myself a big glass of wine, take a nice hot shower, and read a book in bed, my safe place.

When these days happen, what gets you through the day? Whenever I have a bad day, I press the pads of my index fingers and thumb together, take a deep breath, and think “This too shall pass,” which the mantra of my mother, who has repeated that quotation since I was a little girl. You’re right, Mom, the issue at hand, will pass, and I, will be fine…

Everyone handles stress and bad days differently. I collected mantras from other bloggers across the Internet; please enjoy them below…

Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.

“Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.”

I love this mantra because it really is as easy as breathing out the bad. No matter if it one incident or a period in your life, it is always best to keep your head up and be positive.

Yolanda from Inspire and Wander

How can I turn this day around-

“How can I turn this day around?”

If I am having a bad day, I like to ask myself, “How can I turn this day around?”  Dwelling on the negative is a roadblock to contentment and if something did go wrong, I remind myself, things can only get better. I try to teach this to my children as well. I will often ask them, “How can we turn this frown upside down?” or “Let’s find what you need to make things better.” A snuggle or connection with me will do the trick most times. We all have bad days, but it is best to keep a positive attitude. Although that is not possible 100% of the time, we can use our “bad days” as inspirations to make life improvements and remembering those low times only helps us appreciate the amazing days that much more.

Sarah Molenda from I Heart Frugal

Copy of This too shall pass.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” or “This is a blessing in disguise.”

It shifts my perspective from paranoia (universe is against you) to pronoia (everything is for you/ to help you)… so many times we don’t see the blessing in the current “curse” until later on in hindsight.
For example: “Thank God I missed that flight because I wouldn’t have bumped into the love of my life at the airport later that day”… or maybe more subtle, how do we know that if we hadn’t tripped over that stick, we wouldn’t have arrived to the crosswalk 5 seconds sooner and that racing car that came around the corner might have hit us? Or if I hadn’t been severely sick in bed for 1 week I would have amazing realization/ breakthrough/ opportunity, etc. The butterfly effect! 🙂 So I always thank every bad day and any situation, no matter how seemingly “negative.”

Silvia from Siya Yoga

It's all good.

“It’s all good.”

This is something that my husband is known for saying. It’s a reminder that no matter how chaotic or stressful the situation, everything will be okay. It’s easy to get caught up and stress over small things. Sometimes saying, “It’s all good” helps me remember what matters most.

Lacee from Lacee Does Life

How can I turn this day around- (1)

“Get some sleep, and it will look better in the morning.”

It is so cliched, but in almost every situation it seems to ring true. I’m a sensitive person, so I can get worked up about things big and small… but even the most intense things I’ve been through in life are usually worst at night, and at least a little bit better after I’ve woken up in the morning. And of course, then I remind myself to “be nice to myself” the next day, which is something my mom always tells me if I’ve had a bad day.

Laura from A Kaleidoscope Heart

Nevertheless, she persisted.

“Nevertheless, she persisted.” -said by Mitch McConnell about Elizabeth Warren

It’s so simple, but it’s so powerful. When I’m having a bad day, I would want someone to say this about me. It’s short, sweet, but conveys both girl power and the need to constantly push on, because bad days will come to an end when the sun goes down, and I am stronger than one bad day.

Kylee from According 2 Her

What can I be grateful for right now-

A quotation I use to pull me through a bad day or rough experience is this, “What can I be grateful for right now?” This pulls my mind away from whatever is uncomfortable or undesirable and brings me back to a space of abundance, light, and calm. It reminds me that there is always good around me, that I always have everything I need, and that I am exactly where I am meant to be at all times.

Riley Reign, blogger & intuitive mentor from Spirit and Soul Blog & Riley Reign

Final Thoughts

I hope some of these mantras help get you through your next tough day.

Which quotation above impacts you most?

What do you tell yourself when you have a bad day?

Namaste.

What to Think when You_re Having a Bad Day

So, when are you going to have kids?

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adobe-spark-4

“So, when are you going to have kids?”

“I don’t know. When are you going to lose weight?”

I’ve never said that, but I’ve wanted to…

Let’s try that again…

“So, when are you going to have kids?”

“I have furkids. A dog, sometimes a foster dog, and two cats.”

That’s more like my response.

On April 10, I will turn 30. On April 11, we will have been married for 3 years.

I have a dog, Bailey, a foster dog, and two cats, Jack and Ace. Right now, they are my furchildren. When people ask me when I am going to have human children, I answer their question depending on my mood.

I fluctuate between wanting to be a mother and wanting to remain childless. I look at my life now, bound only by my husband and animals. My mother, mother-in-law, or pet sitter could watch Bailey on short notice. My aunt loves cat-sitting. My husband can fend for himself if I go away with friends for a weekend. A child, however, needs more than a daily walk, litter box change, and food in a bowl. The career and Master’s degree I worked so hard for (and am still paying off) would put on pause to stay home and raise a child. I’m not one for day care; why bother since the cost wouldn’t even be worth me going to work. I never pictured myself jobless and financially dependent on my husband. I like to earn my own money and support myself. I can’t imagine being in my house all day, tending to a child and animals, cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry. I would go stir-crazy. No way. I’m already crazy. Then, I think about holding my baby in my arms, watching he or she grow and develop, and giving my parents and in-laws grandchildren. I think about the sleepless nights and poopy diapers, but the smiles, laughter, and endless amount of love might surpass rearranging my life and becoming a real housewife. I think parents call it unconditional love. Every morning I see a woman with a double stroller and her two dogs, jogging, and I think to myself, She is an awesome mom. She looks amazingly fit. She has 2 dogs and 2 kids. I can be her.

I look at the moms that I work with, and most of them seem overworked and overwhelmed. They are always on the phone in the closet or bathroom talking to the guidance counselor about Shawn’s D in geometry class or Kelly’s F in gym class. Some of them watch their nanny cams intently during their lunch break. I hear about day care nightmares and how little Abby is sick, once again. They sometimes share achievements and other developmental milestones, but most the time it focuses around what they must do (homework, doctor’s appointments, activities etc.), as if it were an inconvenience. When I mention how miserable they sound, usually they go into some story about how hard being a mother is, but how they love it and wouldn’t change it for the world. Having a kid sounds like a mixed bag.

I look at the adults without children and they seem happy, and content with not having children, but I always get a sense of worry when future planning is discussed. “Who is going to take care of me? I’m going to wind up in a nursing home.”  The childless adults are the people that I see have less wrinkles, more free time, take several extravagant vacations, have the most amazing gadgets, and are current on the latest trends. They seem a lot more relaxed but I sometimes see sadness and apprehension about the future.

My opinions on having children fluctuates day to day.  I have contemplated having none, being one-and-done and having two+ kids. Twins run in my family and sometimes I pray to God to give me a boy and girl, the ultimate two for one deal.

When asked: “When are you going to have kids?” these questions run through my head: What if I can’t get pregnant? What if we have problems? Why do people ask me this stupid, personal, invasive question? I don’t want to do IVF. Maybe we should start trying. Maybe we should wait until next year. What do I really want? I don’t know what I want. Maybe, I’m just not ready. Will I ever be ready? Shouldn’t I want to have a kid? I am a woman! I have a time clock. I don’t want to be an old mom. I’ll be happy, no matter what, right? And the chatter continues…

Take that question and remove it from your repertoire. If you can help it, let the undecided woman be. Let her decide in her own time and her own way what is right for her.

Whatever is meant to be, will happen. Whether I have none, one, two, twins, or three+, life will continue.

“So, when are you going to have kids?”

“Maybe tonight, maybe next week, maybe next month, maybe next year, maybe never.”

Namaste.

21. 29. 30.

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me

Tap on my shoulder.

“HOW OLD ARE YOU?”

“How old do you think I am?”

“21, maybe.”

“I’m 29. How old are you?”

“40.”

“Do you have a boyfriend?”

“I’m MARRIED.” Take ring, shove in face.

He shakes head.

“Oh, that sucks, being married. No fun for you.”

“Actually, it’s great, keeps me away from people like you.”

Australian friend: “You’re mean.”

“No one said I had to be nice.”

*

Standing at bathroom with drink in hand waiting for friend.

Security guard. “Ma’am I need to see your ID.”

“I was IDed before I entered the casino floor, Sir.”

“Ma’am, I’ll ask you again, I need to see your ID.”

Give ID. (I was so close to saying, you didn’t ask, you demanded, but I bit my tongue.)

“Oh wow, pretty unbelievable, have a great night.”

*

Enter through security at concert.

“Did they ID you over there?”

“Yes, they did.”

“Well, I’m going to need to see it again.”

Give ID.

“NO. No WAY. I was WRONG about you. 29? Really?” Takes ID, puts near face.

How old do I look?

“Younger than 21, We all IDed you!”

*

My ID was handy in my cross body bag the entire night, and I could feel my friend’s eyes look over at me because I looked under 21 and that made everyone else get IDed. One of my friends pulled a, “Do you need my ID too?” when she didn’t get carded. She probably did it so I wouldn’t feel bad. The guy barely glanced at their ID, but everyone seemed to study and scan mine. “No time for fakes”, I would say, and they would look at me like I was lying and had two heads. Maybe it was the vodka talking, but I was happy and feeling vibrant.

I overheard some idiot said women age like milk, men age like wine which made me sad and angry, simultaneously. Before my friends and I went out for the night, I was talking about injections and fillers and how I would consider them in the future. I mentioned how I try to eat right, exercise, treat myself to an occasional facial, and have no problem slathering on the latest lotions and potions to prevent fine lines and wrinkles from sneaking up on my face. I am still waiting for my first gray hair, (I check every day) and when I see one, I have my hair stylist on speed dial and she will be dying that little gray hair quicker than I can blink my blue-green eyes.

My girl’s night out certainly validated that I look significantly younger than my age, and some lovely 40-year-old gentleman tried his best to grab my attention with that amazing pick-up line and shoulder tap, (insert sarcasm here), but the truth is that in April, I will turn 30, and it scares the living daylights out of me. No matter how young I look, I will enter a new decade. There is no lotion, potion, or time reversal serum to slather on my face. There is no time transportation vessel to bring me back to my beloved college years or wedding day.

My 20s were all about finding myself, finishing graduate school, starting my career and getting married. I had huge life changes and transitions. My 30s, I think, will be more of the same, but with a more developed, don’t-really-care-what-you-think, I’m-really-adulting-now, attitude.

I always ask my patients what their secrets are to looking young. I’ve heard “everything in moderation,” to slather olive oil on your face, to have lots of sex, to drink lots of red wine. Whatever it is, I’m actively looking for the fountain of youth. In the meantime, I am happy to look significantly younger than my age, never cringe or get defensive when I get carded, and remind myself that age is just a number. We live in a world with so many innovations to slow the aging process (that I am willing to try). So, I say, bring it on. My baby face will be fine.